Monday, December 31, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
Ho Ho Ho
How to watch a google video......
Press play... then press pause... let is simmer for 5 minutes then hit play again... This will allow the whole file to cache on your computer instead of being choppy.
We made Sabrina a video.
Merry Christmas sweetheart. Kimberly and I have had knots in our throats for 2 days while we made this. You are precious to us. It just isn't the same without you.
Merry Christmas!
Love,
Dad
Click Here To See Your Video
Click here to see your video
Thursday, December 20, 2007
She REALLY REALLY got it
The post I wrote last night was really a "bread-crumb trail" to lead Sabrina to her letter of acceptance from SUNY New Paltz that we got in the mail yesterday. I didn't want to tell her over the phone. Before she left Sabrina told me she would kill me if I read it and told her... she wanted to open her acceptance letter.
Anyways... Kimberly, Christopher and I had the honor of being on the phone with Sabrina in Ecuador as she clicked her way onto the letter. I wish I had taped her reaction... She got it. Sabrina really understood how her life pivoted into a new direction.
I have been a relentless, deaf idiot to my kids about college. I try to act interested in who they take to the Prom, and whether they get to cut on Senior Cut Day. I try to feign interest in whether their job pays $8 or $10 per hour. Honestly I know. I really know that all of that pales in significance to the question "where are you going to college next Aug."
Sabrina will be going to the cutest school, in the most charming little town at the foot of beautiful mountains, just a 70 mile train ride from Manhattan. Sabrina will be a fluent Spanish speaker who is getting a degree from one of the best teaching colleges in the United States. In 5 years Sabrina is finally much more likely to be teaching High School kids to speak spanish, than she is likely to wear a blue smock and man the cash register at Wal*Mart.
There is no shame in the blue smock... The problem is there is no career path to get from there to teaching kids to speak spanish. The only way to get inside the walls of the castle has to do with this letter of acceptance.
All of our kids have gone to primary education for 13 years. There is however a profound difference with what they do from there. Ironically 11 of the 13 years have almost no bearing on what happens next. The results of your 10th and 11th grade years end up being being the most powerful forces to determine what you do with the 50 working years of your life.
Now there are still a million chances for things to change but I can infer some great things. My guess in Sabrinas kids will get braces if they need them. I bet Sabrina has a career that includes health insurance, vacation time, and a retirement program. I bet that Sabrina won't have to drag too many carts in from parking lots, clean public restrooms, or have bosses named Gomer. I bet Sabrina won't be working in a factory, a mine, or a fast food kitchen after her 22nd birthday.
I am so proud of my daughter... but most importantly I am so happy that she has put herself in a position to put her wonderful talents to great use. I hope that someday Sabrina gets to watch the light go on, and see one of her students open a letter like this one.
You Go Girl!
Anyways... Kimberly, Christopher and I had the honor of being on the phone with Sabrina in Ecuador as she clicked her way onto the letter. I wish I had taped her reaction... She got it. Sabrina really understood how her life pivoted into a new direction.
I have been a relentless, deaf idiot to my kids about college. I try to act interested in who they take to the Prom, and whether they get to cut on Senior Cut Day. I try to feign interest in whether their job pays $8 or $10 per hour. Honestly I know. I really know that all of that pales in significance to the question "where are you going to college next Aug."
Sabrina will be going to the cutest school, in the most charming little town at the foot of beautiful mountains, just a 70 mile train ride from Manhattan. Sabrina will be a fluent Spanish speaker who is getting a degree from one of the best teaching colleges in the United States. In 5 years Sabrina is finally much more likely to be teaching High School kids to speak spanish, than she is likely to wear a blue smock and man the cash register at Wal*Mart.
There is no shame in the blue smock... The problem is there is no career path to get from there to teaching kids to speak spanish. The only way to get inside the walls of the castle has to do with this letter of acceptance.
All of our kids have gone to primary education for 13 years. There is however a profound difference with what they do from there. Ironically 11 of the 13 years have almost no bearing on what happens next. The results of your 10th and 11th grade years end up being being the most powerful forces to determine what you do with the 50 working years of your life.
Now there are still a million chances for things to change but I can infer some great things. My guess in Sabrinas kids will get braces if they need them. I bet Sabrina has a career that includes health insurance, vacation time, and a retirement program. I bet that Sabrina won't have to drag too many carts in from parking lots, clean public restrooms, or have bosses named Gomer. I bet Sabrina won't be working in a factory, a mine, or a fast food kitchen after her 22nd birthday.
I am so proud of my daughter... but most importantly I am so happy that she has put herself in a position to put her wonderful talents to great use. I hope that someday Sabrina gets to watch the light go on, and see one of her students open a letter like this one.
You Go Girl!
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Is this all there is...
Fatherhood has gone from a raging river that demanded my fullest commitment into a trickling brook that peacefully makes pretty background noises to my otherwise mundane life.
Today, just when I was snoozing, I came across some really great reading. I was reminded that being invested in the lives of young people provides dividends that can't be rivaled.
Please read this... and make sure to follow the link underneath to the second document. You too can share the rollercoaster.
;)
http://gardencenternews.com/sabrina
Today, just when I was snoozing, I came across some really great reading. I was reminded that being invested in the lives of young people provides dividends that can't be rivaled.
Please read this... and make sure to follow the link underneath to the second document. You too can share the rollercoaster.
;)
http://gardencenternews.com/sabrina
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Over-rated....... Independence
As a father, I am stunned at how little joy I get from the independence of my older children.
I have been the kind of person that counts down to all of the milestones in life. I got a job at 10, drove at 12, joined the military on my 17th birthday, was married a year after I got out etc.
From the time my kids were born I would say stupid things like "By the time I am 45 Tom, Dave and Sabrina will all be out on their own. That makes as much sense as counting the days till summer vacation is over, or the hours until 9AM on a Monday morning. The more sensible approach is to be in the moment and fully enjoy where you are. Here I was with 10 year old kids wishing for 20 year old kids.
While we make our lives plans; God chuckles.
Now I have had 34 years in the work force and in fact my oldest kids have moved right past me in their lives. I now have much less to look forward to. I will be happy when..... Now has senior citizen discount eligibility attached to it.
I am light hearted in this complaint. In honesty my life has been fuller than almost anyone I know. Having 5 kids is a blessing that is hard to overlook. I am however very honest in my advice not to wish it all away. The sound of a crying baby really is a blessing. The chance to take care of a sick kid, or sit through another Christmas Concert for Elementary Schoolers is a gift. There are a finite number of little league games, concerts, dances, plays, and chicken tender value meals.
I check Sabrina's Blog every day and over a month passes without mention of what is going on. You know kids here can say, it's boring there is nothing to tell about. On the contrary Sabrina is in Ecuador and experiencing a life I have never known. I know that she too is caught up in it all, but I do miss her and I miss being a part of her life. I don't know who her best friend it. I don't know what she had for dinner. I don't know which teacher is giving her fits. As a matter of fact I don't know the names of a single friend or a single teacher. How could I keep a blog, and ignore this?
I know that we raise our kids to be independent. Independence in the goal. It is evidence of our success. On the other hand it feels like a really big loss. I am happy for my kids. I just thought that it might feel better when it happens.
Shuffle Board anyone?
I have been the kind of person that counts down to all of the milestones in life. I got a job at 10, drove at 12, joined the military on my 17th birthday, was married a year after I got out etc.
From the time my kids were born I would say stupid things like "By the time I am 45 Tom, Dave and Sabrina will all be out on their own. That makes as much sense as counting the days till summer vacation is over, or the hours until 9AM on a Monday morning. The more sensible approach is to be in the moment and fully enjoy where you are. Here I was with 10 year old kids wishing for 20 year old kids.
While we make our lives plans; God chuckles.
Now I have had 34 years in the work force and in fact my oldest kids have moved right past me in their lives. I now have much less to look forward to. I will be happy when..... Now has senior citizen discount eligibility attached to it.
I am light hearted in this complaint. In honesty my life has been fuller than almost anyone I know. Having 5 kids is a blessing that is hard to overlook. I am however very honest in my advice not to wish it all away. The sound of a crying baby really is a blessing. The chance to take care of a sick kid, or sit through another Christmas Concert for Elementary Schoolers is a gift. There are a finite number of little league games, concerts, dances, plays, and chicken tender value meals.
I check Sabrina's Blog every day and over a month passes without mention of what is going on. You know kids here can say, it's boring there is nothing to tell about. On the contrary Sabrina is in Ecuador and experiencing a life I have never known. I know that she too is caught up in it all, but I do miss her and I miss being a part of her life. I don't know who her best friend it. I don't know what she had for dinner. I don't know which teacher is giving her fits. As a matter of fact I don't know the names of a single friend or a single teacher. How could I keep a blog, and ignore this?
I know that we raise our kids to be independent. Independence in the goal. It is evidence of our success. On the other hand it feels like a really big loss. I am happy for my kids. I just thought that it might feel better when it happens.
Shuffle Board anyone?
Monday, December 10, 2007
Prodigals take a number
Adikes kids have this wanderlust thing... It has been going on for generations, and I have been the child of one, the wanderer, and now the parent of one.
Being the parent or wandering children is not easy for me. I have Tom and Dave living in Phoenix and Sabrina living in Ecuador. I am a big believer in autonomy and free will. I am grateful that I have been able to make life choices for myself without parental coercion, so now I feel obliged to not put conditions on my kids in the same way.
On the other hand, it is a lonely thing for me. I am keenly aware that we all have a finite number of days on this planet, and to have hundreds pass between hugs and big daddy breakfasts is hard to swallow. These are decisions that I don't get to make that affect my whole life.
For the largest part of my life, Tom Dave and Sabrina have been my largest responsibility. It is the responsibility that I took with the most commitement. It was the driving force behind every decision.
Now that responsibility doesn't influence anything anymore. I don't plan my days off, or my dinner menu, or vacation plans around them. I still have Philip and Christopher to be responsible for, but so much less so. Philip and Christopher both have mothers that are intensely protective and organized. I am like the parsley on the plate for them.
I miss being essential, and so significant. I miss the talks, and the drives, and the watching. It was alot of fun being their Dad.
Tonight at 5:50PM Dave is getting off the plane from Phoenix. He is in town for 4 days. I will be competing with Emily, his Mom, his Grandmother, his Orthodontist, the Wolf Road Diner. and then in 4 days the plane leaves again, and the silence gets deafening.
For every Christmas I can recall I hear "I'll be home for Christmas" and I feel deep sadness for that gene in us that makes us all get on planes, trains and busses.
Being the parent or wandering children is not easy for me. I have Tom and Dave living in Phoenix and Sabrina living in Ecuador. I am a big believer in autonomy and free will. I am grateful that I have been able to make life choices for myself without parental coercion, so now I feel obliged to not put conditions on my kids in the same way.
On the other hand, it is a lonely thing for me. I am keenly aware that we all have a finite number of days on this planet, and to have hundreds pass between hugs and big daddy breakfasts is hard to swallow. These are decisions that I don't get to make that affect my whole life.
For the largest part of my life, Tom Dave and Sabrina have been my largest responsibility. It is the responsibility that I took with the most commitement. It was the driving force behind every decision.
Now that responsibility doesn't influence anything anymore. I don't plan my days off, or my dinner menu, or vacation plans around them. I still have Philip and Christopher to be responsible for, but so much less so. Philip and Christopher both have mothers that are intensely protective and organized. I am like the parsley on the plate for them.
I miss being essential, and so significant. I miss the talks, and the drives, and the watching. It was alot of fun being their Dad.
Tonight at 5:50PM Dave is getting off the plane from Phoenix. He is in town for 4 days. I will be competing with Emily, his Mom, his Grandmother, his Orthodontist, the Wolf Road Diner. and then in 4 days the plane leaves again, and the silence gets deafening.
For every Christmas I can recall I hear "I'll be home for Christmas" and I feel deep sadness for that gene in us that makes us all get on planes, trains and busses.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Jingle Bell time.....
Like a special order... we got a dusting of snow on Saturday morning as we loaded the boys in the truck for our annual trek up the mountain to cut down our Christmas Tree.
This is a great trip because each one carries the memories of "Christmas Tress Past." The act of choosing, cutting and hauling this tree has been a highlight for me over the years. The kids are always proud when we put it up that they selected it. They saw the inner beauty of that particular tree, and now it is showing everyone what a great choice it was.
We cut the tree down yesterday and today we went to see our friends Cathy and Bud Vogt. We were in their heated greenhouse as their crew made dozens of wreaths, kissing ball, boughs, and bows. It is fast propelling me into the spirit.
This morning at Mass, Father Noone showed photos he took of Zoo Lights in Phoenix. I was so proud because Thomas worked there for 3 years, and I knew that some of the photos that Father Noone was showing were of work that Thomas had done. I will have to explain in a later post how Father Noone works Zoo Lights into his homily.
This is a great trip because each one carries the memories of "Christmas Tress Past." The act of choosing, cutting and hauling this tree has been a highlight for me over the years. The kids are always proud when we put it up that they selected it. They saw the inner beauty of that particular tree, and now it is showing everyone what a great choice it was.
We cut the tree down yesterday and today we went to see our friends Cathy and Bud Vogt. We were in their heated greenhouse as their crew made dozens of wreaths, kissing ball, boughs, and bows. It is fast propelling me into the spirit.
This morning at Mass, Father Noone showed photos he took of Zoo Lights in Phoenix. I was so proud because Thomas worked there for 3 years, and I knew that some of the photos that Father Noone was showing were of work that Thomas had done. I will have to explain in a later post how Father Noone works Zoo Lights into his homily.
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